Are you able to live without Facebook?
Are you able to go without checking your email every single hour?
Are you willing to walk without carrying your cell phone?
What we all learned is that we love our online world.
We love the connections and the friendships. We love the learning and the inspiration. We need each other as we are a tribe and we need those relationships to stay healthy and vibrant as mothers.
But we don’t love feeling like less than enough and Facebook tends to leave us feeling that way. We don’t like feeling stressed and overwhelmed by other people’s stories and other people’s to-do lists — and living room arrangements as we see on Pinterest.
So we went minimalist in our social media.
Many in the group have unplugged entirely from Facebook — not just for the month, but for good. We began using mindful social media tips to really make our time online super productive and positive. We even began using an online to do lists to keep our time focused.
Others checked out of groups that were making them feel less than, overwhelmed or like they aren’t enough as they are right now.
I’m obviously in the business to inspire people to read my social media accounts, but I have a very specific niche here and I dare myself to not do what others do and bombard your feeds with things you’ve already read elsewhere.
So, I hope you only choose to read what’s working for you right now, what’s lifting you up and inspiring you — and not adding more noise to your day.
It’s always your choice. It’s always your option to press pause.
Your online time should feel productive and leave you feeling confident and happy with your life. You should find friends who deeply care about you and your mission, whatever it is.
If it’s not, you may need to make some changes. Some really big changes.
Here are my personal 10 Mindful Social Media Tips to Bring Ease to Your Day:
- Be super selective. Before you join a group, make sure the tone of the group is both relaxed and positive and not adding more guilt or more pressure to your day. And, make sure the group isn’t going to be just one more thing to distract you from your real practice — living your life the way you want to live it.
- Unfollow every single negative person you don’t want to hear from and release their hold on your mind and your energy.
- Follow blogs and businesses that make you feel good and worthy — and to do that click in the upper right part of that page “Get Notifications” or else you will miss the good stuff and only see the junk. I’m not sure how that works but it’s true.
- Save your own updates for the best possible things to share, which means not everything. And that really means don’t just update about how busy you are. (I’m saving your friendships by telling you this.)
- Ask your children if you can post their pictures. If they can make their own decisions on what to wear, they can say yes or no to being on Facebook. And, even then they don’t really know the big picture.
- Turn off all notifications. This is hard to do, but overtime you will find that this is actually the biggest influencer in feeling less of a pull to social media. If you must get notifications, do so only for the people you really want to hear from.
- Share what makes you happy to spread the love and make others happy. Don’t share junk. Junk just adds to the noise and ruins the Internet. And, if you are truly happy, don’t be afraid to share that, too. Your happiness is a good thing.
- Use social media to maintain connections, not to create animosity or to push your opinions and lectures onto other people. Life is meant to be shared and traveled together. Do your part to make the online world a better place.
- Just Be Kind. Imagine that face, that writer, that person on the other side of your screen is actually right there in front of you. Their heart beats just like yours. Their feelings get hurt just like yours. If you wouldn’t say something to them in real life than don’t say it to them through screens that are thousands of miles apart. This is the Golden Rule of the Internet. And your “being nasty” comment might really ruin someone’s day.
- Forget FOMO (The Fear of Missing Out) of your online world. Instead, consider FOMO of your real life. Fear of Missing Out on your child’s silly dance or your partner’s great idea. Fear of Missing Out on the real things happening in your real life should be your highest priority.
This post originally included another tip, which doesn’t apply to everyone. I suggest using a Facebook group for your partner and yourself to communicate fun ideas back and forth. If you’re relationship is at all like mine, 80 percent of the day is spent at work, focusing on the children and doing the chores around the house. That leaves little time for dreaming. Using a private group to share ideas and dream can be a fun way to use social media. You could do the same with a secret Pinterest board.
Frequently Asked Questions
How Social Media Affects Your Mental Health?
Playing a slot machine has the same effect on the brain as social networking apps and websites. Because you don’t know what content you’ll see until you open the app, the unexpected results produce a sense of “reward” by releasing dopamine, the same chemical associated with other pleasurable activities like sex and food.
The more we use social media, the less content we appear to be. A few years ago, a study found that Facebook use was associated with lower moment-to-moment happiness and life satisfaction: the more people used Facebook in a day, the lower these two variables were. According to the authors, this may be due to the fact that Facebook evokes a sense of social isolation in a way that other solitary activities do not.
The earlier adolescents begin using social media platforms, the greater the impact on mental health. This is particularly true for women. While adolescent males tend to be physically aggressive, females express aggression by excluding others and making hurtful comments. Such harmful interactions are made more likely by social media.
Did FOMO exist before social media?
To be sure, FOMO existed before social media, but when we have the ability to tune in to hourly updates from our friends about their amazing lives, it’s difficult not to feel like something is missing from ours.
In 2008, Citysearch in Australia ran an ad depicting a poor sap (the “patient”) literally paralysed by indecision about what to do on a Friday night, with a “doctor” warning about the dangers of FOMO. “FOMO and FOBO are irreconcilably opposed forces, the antithesis of yin and yang,” McGinnis wrote in 2004, “and they can drive a person into a paralytic state that I’ll call SWOT, or Fear of Doing Anything.”
FOMO sapiens, who spread around the world each May, landed jobs in industries such as technology, consulting, and finance. They brought FOMO with them to their offices around the country and the world and introduced it to a wider professional audience.
What are the positives of social media?
Social networking encourages self-directed learning, which prepares students to seek answers and make decisions on their own. These social networking skills can be guided and refined in the classroom to produce better learning outcomes and critical awareness. Social networking can help you find groups of people who share your interests or make new friends. Finding a close-knit community can assist us in feeling valued and accepted. Social networking is also a simple way to maintain relationships with family and friends who have relocated. To stay in touch, send messages, share photos, make phone calls, or host video chats.
Teens believe that social networking helps deepen friendships and are more likely to associate their use of social networking with positive emotions, but this optimism is far from universal. Teens post about a wide range of topics on social media, with posts about their accomplishments or family taking centre stage.
Social media allows you to talk about what you know and what you want to be known for. Sharing your knowledge will help you make professional and personal connections. Learn how to present your professional experience, accomplishments, and results, and you will have more opportunities to connect with people who share your interests.