I need to be honest with everyone. You may look at pictures on my Instagram, Facebook or blog and think I have it all together. When I creep on other bloggers’ sites I feel the same way. Regardless if I do have my shit together or not (which I don’t) bloggers, instagramers and tweeters aren’t perfect. Just because I can whip up a bomb meal in 20 minutes, capture it and slap on a filter doesn’t make me immune to life’s insanity. Luckily those crappy things, thoughts and feelings I experience push me to create for you all. Who ever you are, you’re my readers and deserve to know what sparked my website.
Truth is, I want to heal more than anything. For over 2 ½ years now it’s consumed every ounce of me, and I’m only 21 years young. If you have read my about me page, or just know me, you are familiar with my health struggles. I was around 10 years old when my parents divorced. Shortly after, my Dad became a raw-vegan and my mom was anything but. I would pack a suitcase, head to my dads for a week, eat some crunchy, lukewarm food and call my mom to pickup McDonalds an hour later. God bless all ya’ll raw vegans out there, but as a young girl that ruined any hopes for liking vegetables. What pre teen wants to eat dehydrated flax cracker crust pizza with raw nut cheese? That’s some scary shit. All jokes aside, raw vegan food is DELICIOUS and nourishing to my now grown up self. But back then it was gag worthy! (Disclaimer: I love my parents. Just because they fed me weird things doesn’t diminish the fact they are amazing, generous human beings.) As a result of this culinary monstrosity, I heavily indulged in everything from a box, freezer, drive-through window or chain restaurant.
Aside from weak dietary choices, I was never the healthiest kid on the block. As a child I constantly threw up baby formula, ran high fevers and got strep throat allllll the freaking time. Then as I got into high school things progressed even further. At 16 I developed a gnarly case of mononucleosis that almost cost truancy. I remember feeling extremely fatigued after a pep rally, blacking out and waking up three days later in bed. I didn’t return to school for a month. Through out the last couple years of high school the mono relapsed several times and developed into chronic fatigue syndrome. Since then I’ve never really felt the same. Something has always been “off” about me. I’ve suffered intense FOMO (fear of missing out) because I simply don’t have the energy to go out and do the things every 21 year old "should" do. Every now and then I would fall into week (or month) long episodes of binge drinking, eating the world, gaining 10 pounds, and destroying my health all over again; all because I was terrified of missing out. Seriously, hangovers have driven me to the hospital before! And sometimes they hung around for two days. Heads up: that’s not normal.
My first semester of college I also developed 20 ulcers in my small intestine. Yeah, 20! This was 2 ½ years ago, and was the defining moment of my life. Having 20 ulcers feels like dumping salt on an open wound, but well, times 20. I became nauseous every waking second of the day. Everything I ate made me sick, but never told anyone for months until it became unbearable. Eventually I couldn’t make it to class anymore, and dropped out of engineering school to move back home. After months of self-study, doctor’s appointments and chiropractic visits I stumbled upon the paleo diet. With in a week the churning nausea subsided and lentil soup was no longer my only meal. I feel immense gratitude to have stumbled upon this way of eating. I started to experience happiness, friendship and relationships again. It taught the benefits of food quality, but more importantly the quality of life. If we aren’t feeding ourselves adequately, then we aren’t providing ourselves with the best quality of life. That caveman diet saved my life! However, currently I still show signs of chronic fatigue syndrome, low thyroid, and adrenal fatigue from years of stressors.
I know many of you struggle with this too. It’s infuriating whether you want to heal your gut, mood, chronic illness or just desire to be healthy. There IS a solution for you and I. That’s why it’s my mission to find nutrition to heal what ails me. By sharing my experimentation and recipes I hope it will help you too. Every post will have that intention in mind. I’m not perfect, but I’m looking to completely transform my well-being and never look back! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING, and allowing me to become vulnerable with you. Be sure to subscribe if health is up your alley too. If you made it through this post, PROPS. You’re a rock star homie :)