Good God, what a week! It's funny because before I started blogging over the course of 7 days, I didn't fully understand all that we do in a week! Ya'll...it's ALOT. Work, food, emotions, goals, thoughts, travel, family.....UGH. So many things!! That being said, the Week 1 of my 6 Week Keto Challenge has been full, and I can't possibly write a post covering it all. I really want to highlight what I ate, my feelings physically & emotionally, how I felt with stress and what I need to improve on.
What I Ate
I mentioned in my last post that a ketogenic diet is high fat, moderate protein and low carb. HOW low carb? It's recommended to stay under 20g total carbs a day sourcing from non starchy veggies, leafy green veggies, nuts and seeds. I need to clear something up, there are 2 approaches to the ketogenic diet. One is low carb through atkins shakes, sugar free syrups, processed low carb foods, low carb breads, factory farmed meat and practically anything with a label on it. Then there is the REAL food, ketogenic approach. There is a HUGE difference between the two. Sure, going low carb high fat with shakes and bars may help you lose weight; but for health and vitality ONLY really foods can accomplish that. That means I stayed away from grains, gluten, conventional dairy, processed foods and artificial sugars.
A day of eating usually looked like this:
7:00 am: coffee blended with 1 tbsp grass-fed butter or ghee + 1 tbsp MCT oil
11 am: 2-3 eggs cooked in bacon fat + sausage or bacon + 2 cups of spinach or other greens. If I was really hungry I topped it with a tbsp of home made mayo or hollandaise for extra fat.
6 pm: 3-4 oz of grass-fed beef, pork belly, chicken thighs or other protein + 2-3 cups cabbage, kale, mushrooms or other non starchy veg + fat from 1/2 an avocado, mayo
I Gotta Be Honest...
I'm not at all interested in blogging about food today. Over 90% of my issues I had this week have absolutely NOTHING to do with it. I know what to eat, Im fortunate enough to have plenty to eat, and I am capable of making good decisions. I'm equipped with ALL the tools, BUT, I'm a little disappointed in myself.
I was doing amazing this whole week. My macros were perfect, I ate lots of greens, worked out everyday my energy was up! Until....I went out of town. I didn't know how traveling would affect my keto journey, but temptation, emotion and guilt hit me like a bag of bricks. I stopped counting macros because it was "inconvenient" to my family time. This was a big mistake. BIG. At home macros kept me sane because..well.. I'm an emotional eater. It doesn't even matter what emotion I'm feeling either! Happy? EAT Excited? EAT Sad? EAT Stressed? EAT EVERYTHING!! This trip tested me, and I failed. BUT, I've learned some things.
Trip Day 1: Ate perfect macros UNTIL I went to my dads for dinner. He laid out paleo chips, guac and salsa for an appetizer. I tried to control myself but went freaking HAM. So by the time we got to our meal of lamb chops, squash, green beans and mushrooms I was full. But I ate it anyways...duh. Then I felt so shitty about myself that I couldn't even deny dessert. We had fresh whipped cream with pistachios. Let me guess what you're thinking, "But those foods are all so good for you! Does it even matter?" YES it matters. I ate WAY past my full point, and then ate more to hopefully diminish feelings of guilt. Ugh
Day 2: First of all I woke up swollen from the excess of food I ate, stress and lack of water. Then the bf and I went to a convention and I figured I would fast the whole time. BAD CHOICE. Once 12 pm hit I was emotional, hungry, dizzy and willing to cry at anything and everything. So I ate some snacks I brought with me. From that point on it was game over. I was ravenously hungry, and didn't even care what I wanted to eat. I just ate. At the end of the night I ate a whole sugar free chocolate bar to myself. Gross.
Day 3: We went to my bf's fam's house to watch the Cowboys game (ew football). While everything was sugar free and keto friendly, I snacked for 5 hours straight with pretty much no breaks. I had bad allergies and just kept myself numb through food. On top of that, everyone was drinking and I felt so left out that I shoved my face with spinach dip. Freaking delish though....
Today: I woke up very swollen, my eyes hurt, stomach bloated, muscles fatigued and emotionally exhausted. I haven't felt this fatigued in MONTHS. All day long I've dreamt of brownies and craved chips. I feel like I let myself down and failed miserably.
Ya know what? I DID fail. I didn't stay on track. I gave in to emotional cravings, and now I'm paying the price. But there is one thing that's different this time around than failures in the past: I was completely aware of my emotional eating in it's entirety. Before, I ate with out thinking, rationality or thoughts. This time, I KNEW I was emotionally eating and made the conscious decision to do it anyway. Now, I can improve on that. NOW I can be aware of my emotions and chose to NOT eat. I can fill that emotional black hole with something more positive. Maybe a hug from someone I love, reading a book, a walk outside or a quick meditation. I may have miserably failed and left myself in a bit of a hot mess, but there is SO much room for improvement that I can't help but be hopeful. Each day I can start over and continue to strive for progress, not perfection.
So no, my first week wasn't so hot. But for health's sake I'll keep on striving :) If you struggle from emotional eating, disordered eating patterns or anything related PLEASE reach out to me. I'd love to hear from anyone and exchange insight, inspiration and ideas. It's easier to remember you're not a lone than digging your own grave.
Until next week my friends :)